{"product_id":"middle-age-is-weird-young-people-think-you-are-ancient-and-old-people-thing-you-are-young-all-while-you-are-using-your-readers-to-read-the-directions-on-the-pain-cream-for-an-injury-you-got-for-pulling-up-my-underwear-gildan®-18500","title":"Middle Age Is Weird Young People Think You are Ancient and Old","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eClassic Unisex Pullover Hoodie\u003cspan\u003e | Gildan® 18500\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe official hoodie of the in-between.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou’re not old enough to complain about the price of a candy bar being a nickel in your day, and you’re not young enough to understand why everyone is putting raw meat on their face on TikTok.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe kids think you’re old because you have to read the directions on everything. The old folks think you’re young because you still have your original hips.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAnd then there’s you. Standing in the bathroom at 6:45am, hood up, reading glasses fogged up from your coffee, holding a tube of pain cream 2 inches from your eyeballs, trying to figure out if you rub it in or just stare at it menacingly... for an injury you got pulling up your underwear.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNot a car accident. Not a marathon. Underwear. You lost a fight with your own pants.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf that’s not middle age, what is?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWhy this Gildan 18500 is the only hoodie that gets you:\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt’s built like you used to be. This is the Gildan 18500 — the classic, heavyweight 50\/50 beast. 8 oz of cotton\/poly blend that doesn’t quit. It’s warm, it’s tough, it holds its shape after 100 washes, unlike your lower back after sleeping “wrong.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Hood That Hides The Truth: Double-lined hood with matching drawcord. Perfect for when you want to hide the fact that you’re wearing your reading glasses on top of your head while also wearing another pair around your neck. Or when you just don't want anyone to talk to you while you apply that pain cream in the grocery store parking lot.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Pocket For Everything: That giant front pouch pocket? That’s not a pocket. That’s storage for reading glasses #2, the pain cream, the travel-size Advil, the eye drops, the hand lotion, and the receipt you need to read later but can’t because you left your glasses at home.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo Itch, No Shrink, No Drama: You have enough drama with your hamstring that you pulled getting out of the car. This hoodie is preshrunk, pill-resistant, and has a soft fleece interior that feels like being hugged by someone who doesn't ask you to help them move.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWear it everywhere you contemplate your mortality:\u003cbr\u003eTo the hardware store, to your kid’s game where you pull something just by yelling too loud, to the doctor who tells you to “just stretch more.”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eClassic Unisex Pullover Hoodie | Gildan® 18500\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMiddle age is weird. At least you’ll be warm and comfortable while you’re in it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDetails: Gildan 18500 - 8 oz, 50% cotton \/ 50% polyester, air-jet spun for no pilling, double-lined hood, pouch pocket, ribbed cuffs \u0026amp; waistband that actually stay put.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWarning: May cause young people to ask you for life advice and old people to ask you to reach something on the top shelf.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eEveryone needs a cozy go-to hoodie to curl up in, so go for one that's soft, smooth, and stylish. It's the perfect choice for cooler evenings!\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e• 50% pre-shrunk cotton, 50% polyester\u003cbr\u003eHeather Sport Dark Navy is 40% cotton, 60% polyester\u003cbr\u003e• Fabric weight: 8.0 oz\/yd² (271.25 g\/m²)\u003cbr\u003e• Air-jet spun yarn with a soft feel and reduced pilling\u003cbr\u003e• Double-lined hood with matching drawcord\u003cbr\u003e• Quarter-turned body to avoid crease down the middle\u003cbr\u003e• 1 × 1 athletic rib-knit cuffs and waistband with spandex\u003cbr\u003e• Front pouch pocket\u003cbr\u003e• Double-needle stitched collar, shoulders, armholes, cuffs, and hem\u003cbr\u003e• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras or El Salvador\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDisclaimer: Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect Gift Keywords:\u003c\/strong\u003e This bust a gut funny shirt is one of our funny sarcastic t-shirts that makes everyone laugh. Perfect funny gift for birthdays and holidays.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSize guide\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003ctable\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLENGTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWIDTH 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(cm)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e68.6\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e50.8\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e71.1\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e55.9\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e73.7\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e61\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e76.2\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e66\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e78.7\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e71.1\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e81.3\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e76.2\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"mso-margin-top-alt: auto; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable class=\"MsoNormalTable\" border=\"0\" cellpadding=\"0\" style=\"mso-cellspacing: 1.5pt; mso-yfti-tbllook: 1184;\"\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"mso-yfti-irow: 0; mso-yfti-firstrow: yes;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eGeneral\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eThe Gildan 18500 hoodie is known for its robust fabric blend, comfort, and versatility, making it a popular choice for bulk orders and custom designs.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"mso-yfti-irow: 1;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eWash\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eMachine wash with cold water is recommended to maintain the integrity of the fabric.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"mso-yfti-irow: 2;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eDry\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eTumble dry on medium setting.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"mso-yfti-irow: 3; mso-yfti-lastrow: yes;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eStore\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: .75pt .75pt .75pt .75pt;\"\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin-bottom: 0in; line-height: normal;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: 'Times New Roman',serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ligatures: none;\"\u003eThis hoodie is widely available online through various retailers, offering ease of purchase.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"heritagehumor.com","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":67987014418563,"sku":"ff86ab94-05d8-4136-b061-4d916f48ec94","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":68186207322243,"sku":"7308d6cf-02fd-4503-8c44-13b331726c1e","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":68186207355011,"sku":"944690d1-e892-43ca-8167-37535640a4a4","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":68186207387779,"sku":"7914724e-a0b8-4ffc-ab33-4a95a484c7fb","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 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4XL","offer_id":68186208010371,"sku":"fea8f732-8090-41aa-ab8c-7048a4c88dc0","price":49.97,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Pink \/ 5XL","offer_id":68186208043139,"sku":"f98ce9cf-b3df-4826-bfe3-e91f23363879","price":52.85,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ S","offer_id":68186208075907,"sku":"aac5b2be-e613-40e7-849c-5162fb8a1eb9","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ M","offer_id":68186208108675,"sku":"4196e297-7833-4539-95f5-13dc89e4c203","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ L","offer_id":68186208141443,"sku":"96cf94a8-3430-4512-86b8-19c1bd675f27","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ XL","offer_id":68186208174211,"sku":"9c4147eb-90c6-4cc2-be11-3072f77f3594","price":43.91,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sand \/ 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